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Veho
Veho
TFW friendships built on mutual neurodivergent special interests, so you can just pick up where you left off at any time.
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Nikokaro
Nikokaro
Dear lad, true friendship is not about the talk you have, but about the experiences you share. 😉
Veho
Veho
And that's why the (surviving) Donner party members were such good friends for the rest of their lives.

:unsure:
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Nikokaro
Nikokaro
Never heard of it. I read that it is about american pioneers. Are you referring to cannibalism? Maybe you meant to make a joke, instead you chose a very good example of sharing in suffering (nothing shocking, after all, they had already died of disease).
Anyway, congratulations on your knowledge of american culture and language, which you master excellently (and I envy you).😉
Veho
Veho
Shared experiences can be a good start, but if you don't have anything in common outside of them the relationship can't really last.
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Nikokaro
Nikokaro
I dissent. Not just a good start, but the mainstay. What do you consider most important? Interests in common? Then mere acquaintances who hang out at a bar and share a passion for football would all be great friends? Nah, I'm talking about real, deep friendship, not superficial gossipy camaraderie!
Veho
Veho
Ah, we seem to have some different definitions of "experience" and "commonality" here. I would say watching football at a bar with a bunch of regulars is an enjoyable shared experience, but no basis for actual friendship.
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Nikokaro
Nikokaro
That is superficial commonality of interest, not lived experience. I consider the latter to be much more radical and foundational, regarding major life events that leave a mark on one's interiority. Of course, the misunderstanding is perhaps also due to my approximate knowledge of english and difficulty in expressing myself appropriately. 😅
Veho
Veho
I still disagree. One could argue that having and raising a baby together is a major positive life-changing event, but so many people get divorced. Or grow to hate each other. Or both.
If you could give me an example of a shared experience that guarantees a lasting friendship we could revolutionize the marriage counseling industry :ha:
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Nikokaro
Nikokaro
I never said that a strong shared experience is enough, but certainly it is more important than just common interests. Also a certain affinity of character and feeling, or complementarity, even matching life goals. Your last example is wrong from the beginning: there is no friendship there (passion, love, attraction yes) either before or after. In contrast, the other example of the u.s. pioneers is fitting. 😉
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