My dad made a "Face Book" to find "nice people"

So, to preface, my father is a 65 year old Persian man, who doesn't really have a concept of anything past the 1990s. He doesn't understand credit cards, he cannot make a call with a cellular nor smart phone, and he thinks Amazon makes every computer ever. The most experience he has with tech is playing poker on a tablet. And he doesn't know how to get rid of the micro-transaction popups, so he gives up when those happen.

So of course he'd be the prime person to use Facebook. Wait what?

He walked into my room today, acting very nervous, and asked me, quietly, "'Chary'...What is a, I may say this wrong...eh...Face Book?" I told him it's a site where people post about their life, basically, and share pictures. He was confused, but he tried to accept it. After all, he still thinks to share a picture, you have to go to a place to get film developed and printed. But he'd heard from a friend of his that people can "talk" to each other, without phone numbers. He had to know what kind of magic allowed something that wild and new.

When I told him that you can indeed talk to people by using "something sorta like a typewriter, yeah", he excitedly asked me to make an account for him. He wanted to talk to his sisters in Iran, and catch up with them. So as I'm getting one of my alt emails for an account, he asks me, "Do they need my address? I bet I have to give them my address, right? Will I break your mom's Facebook if I make one!?" then he starts to worry. I'm trying my best to hide my laughter, and I tell him it's okay, he doesn't need to worry. Then, he pulls out a ten dollar bill, and tells me to "Pay for a Face Book this way". I just lose it at this point and burst out laughing. First of all, he thought he needed to pay for Facebook. Second, he thought he thought I could send the money in the mail for it. That's too funny.

Once I finalize his account, he gets all excited. I try to teach him how to use the laptop, telling him to click on the search bar, and type in who he wants to find. He doesn't understand what a click is. Agonizingly, I teach him from step 1 how to use this new and wondrous technology. He still can't get it. So I give up and type his sister's name in, and find her profile, and friend it. Dad doesn't seem to fully understand anything that's going on, but he seems to grasp that now he can talk with his sister. He dictates a message, which I type, and I send it.

Finally finished, I go sit down and play some games and write. He continually calls me back into the living room, for different issues. He accidentally hit the windows key, so he thinks he broke the computer. Go back, sit down. Get called back, because he doesn't understand why his brother "liked" his message. What is a like!? Get called back to solve the mysterious issue of him clicking this weird thing called Google. Go back, sit down, grab my controller... and get called back, because he's sad. Why is he sad? He clicked an ad that told him he could get free things by clicking it. Cue an eye twitch. Install Adblock. Go back to my room.

Then finally, once last time, he asks me how to find more people to talk to. I tell him to type what he wants to find, in the facebook search. So I watch him stare at the screen, and one by one, type in letters. I glance back up at the screen to see "nice people" typed into the facebook bar. I don't know whether to "d'awww" or die from laughter.

My dad might not know much about computers, but he's learning, and in quite possibly the funniest way possible.

Comments

"he still thinks to share a picture, you have to go to a place to get film developed and printed."
omg i haven't even read everything and i already love it XD
 
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I can't believe you let your dad use a botnet ;O;
Joke aside, make sure to keep adblock on and maybe install one of those site filters so he doesn't end up going somewhere else by mistake.
 
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Good for him to have a very nice and patient daughter like you.

Not me, but I know a lot of people very ungrateful with their parents and who would never in their life teach them about modern tech.
 
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Occupation: Dog father
Hobby: Bleaching curtains
Political views: plz don't deport me

His Facebook material is going to be gold
 
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"He wanted to talk to his sisters in Iran"
Now when this sort of thing happens to me I then end up having to get VPNs installed for them to access facebook and it all goes downhill from there.

That said have you wondered if I guess it would be your cousins are in a similar position?
 
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I'd laugh but then again my father is the same as yours, albeit with terrible temper.
I've seen him throw a CRT monitor across the living room when I was a kid, all because he forgot his password and the ''forgotten password'' link wasn't opening.
This was before Facebook, mind you.
 
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@FAST6191 According to my aunt, she says getting on Facebook is difficult because it's blocked, and I had no idea that was a thing. Her kids, however, are in their mid 30s, and don't live with her, and it seems like she knows how to use a VPN on her own, so I think I'm the odd one out in the family, having to step-by-step make a Facebook account for my dad lol.
 
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@DeadlyFoez her father would be a voice of reason on 4chan

omg what if he went on pol and got red pilled hard
 
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@Yepi69 I've certainly felt like chucking my computer out the window when frustrated, but actually doing such? Yikes.
 
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