I am not sure how to title this blog

I have a lot to cover and I think this blog is rather important to make not only for you guys, but for myself as well. I need to be honest with you guys because I care enough about this community to share my personal thoughts here.

To start this blog like I've done the ones before and that is sum up what's happened since my last blog. Like I said in my last one, I've moved towards better my life and replacing what I've lost. I've actually bought all the Switch games that were taken and new some new ones like Doom and Skyrim, coupled with having bought a second Switch for my girlfriend so we can play Splatoon 2 together. I followed through with continuing to play Pokemon Go more, which has gotten me out and really helped deal with my depression. I still haven't bought another Switch to hack, that's been put on the back burner for the time being until I get a PS4 and Monster Hunter World. Basically I've just been doing everything I said I was going to do in my last blog and nothing has really slowed me down. It's pretty nice to see my plans in action and actually progressing forward.

Recently though I've pondering my time on these threads for the past couple of weeks now and after quite sometime I came to the a profound realization. Why the fuck am I thinking about a website when I am currently working on going back to school and enjoying life with my amazing girlfriend? Seriously it dawned on me that I am thinking about a website that I've been as motivated to stay on as I would be to start a ham sandwich (I am extremely allergic to red meat and thus I don't eat it nor want to eat it because I don't want to get extremely ill.) In the past couple of weeks I've honestly started to lose interest in the site and really just started gaining more interest in bettering my life. To be honest my old reason for being so active was because my life was horrible and I was just online in general to avoid my life. But since leaving my exes, I've started to study to get into college, studying Japanese, and cutting back on my online life. I've only been so active because I felt obligated to be on the Temp after getting a second chance. As the weeks went on though I realized that my life was getting better and started to want to be more involved with my own life. I have a girl who I love and we've been talking about marriage, making plans to move to a new place, to go back to college, and even plans on moving to Japan. My motivation to be online has dwindled so much because my life is better now and I don't need that escape. I don't feel the need to really be online beyond just watching youtube videos and streaming my music as I work. I need to take a long break from this site (and the internet as whole) and only pop on when I have nothing better to do because honestly I simply don't want to be online anymore or at least not as much as I would normally be online.

That all being said, I am not quitting because I know I can't quit, there's literally no other site quite like the Temp. I am however saying that if I vanish for days, weeks, and even months there's a reason that isn't actually a bad thing. I am simply enjoying my life again and really just want to put this site in the background of my life where I'll only be on when I actually feel like it. I wanted to say something because I don't want you guys to think anything bad has happened or I am trying to quit again, but simply explain that I am just doing my own thing now. I am actually happy with where my life is going and I want to continue to go down this road. I of course will keep you guys posted with my regular blogs and be online to watch the forums since I still need them for my regular hacking, but I won't be as active.

Now for some Lilith art! This one was a commission done by my friend Kei, who actually the first artist behind Lilith and also the one who helped redesign her.
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That's great to hear!!

What do you mean by you feel obligated to visit the Temp because you got a second chance?
 
Well, Lilith was banned/suspended not so long ago, then she came back. I guess that is the second chance she's talking about.
 
Ham isn't red meat though.
Good to know you'll still be making blog posts, I enjoy reading them. And I'm glad you're not leaving, the Temp wouldn't be the same without you.
 
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@sarkwalvein @Quantumcat
That is indeed the second chance I am referring to. I was supposed to have been perma suspended, but it was bumped down to one month to give me a cool off period and a second chance. Which being the honorable person I am, I took that to heart and wanted to show that my second chance wasn't in vain.
@The Real Jdbye
It's more like all mammal meat, which is clumped together under the term "red meat." Basically I can only eat meat from birds and fish. This was actually the side effect of a lone star tick bite that I got many years ago.
 
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I'm glad to hear that things are looking up for you and that you're trying to better yourself, that's great! For some people the internet can definitely become a real crutch to escape the harsh realities of life. To be completely honest, I've fallen into that trap many times before and watched others around me do the same. We will miss having you around as frequently, but do what you need to do for yourself :)!
 
I didn't know tick bites could cause that. I had a tick in my ear as a kid and the doctor had to remove it. Didn't get any ill effects from it luckily. But I was paranoid about ticks for years after.
 
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That dog is still sleeping at the table. Buy a bed for that pup. :P

As much as you haven't felt good in the past, is nice to see things become positive. I also think the people should understand better the logic behind "escaping" that it's not something everyone is willing to comprehend. Sometimes people get under heavy pressure in real life and feel trapped and unable to freely express this sensation, so they do some spontaneous things excessively as their way of "freedom" which just depends on the person.

I used to be bullied in school, sometimes I still do even online. I used to wanted to avoid going to school and being with other people, I wanted to just sit in my room playing video games and watching tv. It was something I enjoyed and never had any problems with. Of course I couldn't do this forever even if i wanted to. I didn't have many luxuries or people who liked me. It was a very uniform way of life and I just detested it. Still do, whatever people think it's not easy to just get out and go be around people. People in these conditions lost faith, the will, their logic and deductive reasoning is different. Not being able to believe things can be better when they been bad for so long and pressuring people in that condition doesn't help mentally.

I'm not trying to make a excuse for anyone, but then again it's not like the people who don't have situations like these try to understand.
 
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meh, no shame in disappearing for a few days or longer. but in my experience it's just a nightmare even leaving it for a few days and wading though a few dozen notifications NotLikeThis
 
Monster hunter world is only 38 bucks on psn until the 18th. Btw, add me when you get that ps4.
 
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That's why I'm on the temp so much, to get away from real life ahaha.

I left that one time because it got good, and then bam, depression stupid shit
 
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>ham, red meat

I can't imagine what a red meat allergy is like, but ham and pork could disappear and I wouldn't care. They're disgusting. The only good pig meat is bacon. :(

>moving to Japan

I don't have personal experience with this, but I've heard this is not a good idea from multiple people. Japan has very strict immigration policies, and you pretty much need a work visa to stay in the country for an extended period. You'll never get citizenship, and permanent residence is almost never given and requires severe meritocratic bullshit or marriage to a Japanese citizen. This not even mentioning that a good portion of Japan is still quite xenophobic.

>I am however saying that if I vanish for days, weeks, and even months there's a reason that isn't actually a bad thing.

Definitely not a bad thing! I'm a perfect example of this.
 
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@chaoskagami
It's like lactose intolerance, but far far more painful. I would know because I am also lactose intolerant. I seriously did not choose my vegetarian lifestyle, it was just the luck of the draw. I still eat a lot of cheese though because I can get medication for lactose intolerance, but I can't for meat.
Seriously food and I apparently never get along and it's just the worst. I am just lucky that I don't have any deadly allergies or at least not instant death deadly.
Right now it's still a toss up and something that is more of dream with some realistic aspects to it. Rhi is currently trying to get a job that would get us to Japan. If not living there, we still want to least stay there for a decent enough period of time.

Oh yeah, spending less time online has actually been rather refreshing me. I am still online through out the day though because I am always in need of some tool for something.
 
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Hey is good to see you doing great! You know everyone who cares about you here will always be with open arms, and trust me that at least myself am happy that you are managing great. Stay like that!
 

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