Reflections

What were your teenage years like, reader?
Did you make the most of them? Do you have regrets?
Or, perhaps you are about to embark on your own journey?

Recent literature suggests that we now remain in adolescence until our early-to-mid-twenties, and today I certainly fit that profile. For those of you around a decade ago, this time I am approaching my mid-twenties for realzies.

Back then I remember a brief obsession with Star-Trek comics and in particular a panel in a Voyager book where Seven-of-Nine reflected on her transition out of adolescence into adulthood and her occasional doubts but an overall sense of triumph. For some reason, this particular scene stuck with me, and it's only now, sitting in Euston station following a dinner, that I understand why.

I wonder what the teenaged version of myself would think of who I am today? The things I have already accomplished. The things I now aspire to achieve.
I hope he would be proud, and maybe even a little excited, but, I am not so sure.

Like so many of my generation, my guardian was the internet, and in no small part, it was this particular community which helped shape who I am today.

It was a tumultuous, hormonal time and balancing any of the true accomplishments, the friends and acquaintances made; there were many mistakes made. In particular, episodes which have resulted in valuable reflections over the years, but there's a part of me which profoundly regrets having learned crucial life-lessons this way.

The internet is a poor surrogate for normal, human interaction, and there are zero chances I would have made some of the mistakes I made had I been experienced an internet more representative of reality. Perhaps then I may not have learned the same lessons. But perhaps recent efforts to reshape and censor parts of the net are for the best.

My biggest mistakes, however, were those ultimately alienating those around me, leading to me leaving this community and burning many bridges. Actions I still regret.

Seven-of-Nine's words echo in my head today because I experience the same doubts she did: Do I regret the transition from adolescence to adulthood?
No. I am an entirely different person now, driven by a mission and personal goals, with incredibly deep technical skills and much improved social skills.

Improved enough to see that without a doubt, I squandered my adolescence and so regret how I spent those days.
Improved enough to see that without a doubt, I do not miss being that person.
And improved enough to realize that I shouldn't care about what the teenaged version of myself might have thought of his future self after-all: Even if he didn't mean it, he was a complete asshole.

I hope, dear Reader, you do not make the same mistakes.

A.
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Comments

Wow, I don't think you been around lately. Welcome back, nice to see you and hope things are okay. (Will read post when tv show ends.) :)
 
I'm still in my teenage years, but so far I guess I'm making the most of it. There are still a few things I want to do though, one of them I don't exactly have the courage to do atm :/
 
You are who you are now, but there's a thread that runs through. I like(d) both of you though. I've been through a few transitions myself, and maybe a polar shift or two, so maybe I was seeing the thread that runs through you. (I am not high right now, promise.) Honest reflection is something of value, not everyone can do it, so be glad that you can. Rocknroll.
 
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You know most of what my teenage years were like already.
But I believe we have all done things in our teenage years we regret. Part of growing up is making mistakes, some bigger than others. It's how you learn, so it's unavoidable. I don't think very many people can say they are proud of their teenage years.
 
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"recent efforts to reshape and censor parts of the net are for the best."

You mean that it is bad having a controversial opinion? imo, unless something is illegal, then it shouldn't be censored.
 
I didn't say anything about controversial opinions: Controversial opinions are entirely necessary to have the kind of hard discourse which sometimes drives progress.

What I object to is the kind of polarisation that closed-mindedness—the condemnation and rejection which constitutes it—results in and the bubbles which form around it. The people those bubbles form around become unhealthy and in time radicalized. It doesn't matter the political, religious or moral leaning: These people are not healthy.
We should be doing our utmost to safeguard others from falling into these traps.

The world is not a computer. Morality is not a matter of one versus zero. Life is hard and complicated and our laws continue to evolve as we figure this really hard and complicated stuff out.
Illegal does not automatically mean bad, and legal does not automatically mean healthy.
 
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Hm, I think the final portion of my reply captured my stance pretty well: This stuff is complicated and needs a healthy dose of nuance, so being reductive and absolutist seems pretty naive.
Respectfully, let's not be reductivist and naive when that's part of the topic at hand.

I'll try and work on a snappier sound-byte for the future!
 

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Frederica Bernkastel
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