Your reviews suck

I have been silent for way too many years, but enough is enough.

The gaming industry is filled with "critics" who put high scores on games because the publisher has bought advertising spaces all over the website. Then there are the people who are edgy and give low scores just to ruin the average. In the middle, a swarm of edgy 18 years old who know everything about the Nintendo 64 because they read a Wikipedia article and followed the AVGN.

You all need a reliable source of information, so here I am.

I will soon post a rating system. I won't follow the one everyone use, because apparently 8/10 now means average and 7/10 means it sucks balls.

I won't accept donations in any form. I'm an adult, so I have no interest in companies or people buying me stuff.

My reviews will be professionally accurate and polite. If the site would still have a problem with them, I will find another source and will post the link here. No hard feelings.

Lastly, I will do my best to toss a full review once every week. It will be easier at first because I will review random games I have already played. It might take me longer for longer, unplayed games, because I find asinine to review games I have not fully and thoroughly played. So no, if a game has just came out and it takes me 40 hours to finish the campaign, I'm not going to review it in one week even if I play it since day one.
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Comments

T
I will worship your reviews, master. Yours will be of the upmost quality and I simply cannot get through these long weeks knowing each review is so far away. The staff here won't know what hit them.
 
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I'm all for seeing more people wanna write reviews, and I'm curious to see what you write, but acting high and mighty about it isn't better than some 18 year old being an edgelord...
 
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Reactions: 14 people
V
Can't wait. Would like to see more quality content here (and not just stuff I agree with).

Also the donations part is nice. Would like to see more people do this for passion instead of handouts.
 
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Reactions: 2 people
T
@Sonic Angel Knight Anyone who doesn't come anywhere near his perfection in its purest state. Which is pretty much anyone other than himself, he is our saviour, he will make reviews here great again!
 
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Reactions: 4 people
T
Pretty much but look at what he's stated. He must somehow be better than us!
 
Oh, "okay" As Saitama would say, the MIGHTY ONE PUNCH MAN (Someone else who is better than us.)

I mean if he wanna write a review, go ahead, no need to announce it. Is not a special event like a holiday. Or is he just imitating donald trump? We have one for president, now we need one for video game reviews?:mellow:
 
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To be honest, I have no idea why some of you think it's an attack to the staff. I'm just fed up with the gaming industry and all its "critics" (from Gamespot, IGN...) that I had to read all these years. There have been awful episodes of corruption at a point where now if someone writes a review that's not in line with the others (like the Zelda one) they will be attacked.
 
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Put up or shut up. You're talking big but have nothing to show to back it up.

Some of the GBAtemp official 'reviewers' are terrible, but some are good.

I've never supported a numbers based arbitrary bullshit system. Any time I see a review that ends with a number, I click away. Just write a review. The tl;dr version of reviews are videos. Numbers are just for the ADHD riddled youth of today.
Lets be honest though you wont come up with something better. I imagine you're likely just going to give low scores to games and justify it with "The number system is broken man! I changed it, i'm a genius!"
 
If the point of this is to bring attention to dishonest reviews for cash then yes, i think many are aware of this issue. You want to do something about it, and writing your own for no reason other than you want to show what honest reviews look like and no incentive to do it other than passion, yes i suppose is a way to deal with the problem. I see that and i hope you can achieve your goal. Just that many people may not agree with your opinion or review the same way others have problems with it, or that many may not even have interest in it mostly cause a lagre follow base for review have loyal people. It will be hard to get attention from those who aren't looking for someone new.

I can see you dislike how the industry has been for good reason and hope that you can make the difference you seek. I respect reviews of people who are honest, and i may not always agree with it. But is just my opinion. So please do a review and be happy that you done it, be proud of it and that you tried to make a difference and share with others. :grog:
 
Because Chary used "edgelord" I finally bit the bullet and looked up what the word means. Yes, I don't "internet" as much as most people I guess. Anyways, I have nothing else to say.
 
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I'm diagnosed with ADHA and i don't care about a score. I never did, even playing video games. Now i dunno if i should be offended by that statement. :mellow:
 
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Reactions: 1 person

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