I have a lil problem, maybe you guys can help me out

NeSchn

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Well, since my last couple years in highschool and now more recently out of highschool, I guess I've had a social anxiety problem or somethin like that. I just have a terrible fear of awkward silences, and it doesn't just happen with people I know, it happens all the time even with my friends, so when I'm chattin with my friends sometimes I just try to keep on talking about shit to avoid that awkward silence, but I notice that I start talking about myself alot and it makes me seem really egotistical and I'm not. I'm just trying to avoid the awkward silence.

Is there any suggestions you guys can give me to help me out?
 

monkat

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@Alan...he definitely said ABOUT himself

I'd call you a naughty word here, but I might get banned
wink.gif


I know a few people who have the exact same problem with most people. You just gotta relax. Silence will come and go, but when you get used to having conversations with people, you get to know what they're interested in and how to respond to things in a way that they'll respond to.

It's kinda like this story.

My first date with my current girlfriend was full of awkward silences. In fact, the whole situation was awkward. But y'know. It seemed like we had so little in common. Two years later, though, we can have hour long conversations about the best kind of donut, or our favorite teletubby.

Just gotta get used to it.
 

NeSchn

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monkat said:
@Alan...he definitely said ABOUT himself

I'd call you a naughty word here, but I might get banned
wink.gif


I know a few people who have the exact same problem with most people. You just gotta relax. Silence will come and go, but when you get used to having conversations with people, you get to know what they're interested in and how to respond to things in a way that they'll respond to.

It's kinda like this story.

My first date with my current girlfriend was full of awkward silences. In fact, the whole situation was awkward. But y'know. It seemed like we had so little in common. Two years later, though, we can have hour long conversations about the best kind of donut, or our favorite teletubby.

Just gotta get used to it.
Yeah I know, and there is certain people I can do that with. I feel that if I see someone alot and talk to them alot I have no problem having a conversation but say if its one of my friends that I havent seen for a few weeks, I just don't know what to say so then it just gots awkward lol.

But yeah, I guess I do just gotta relax
 

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NeSchn said:
Well, since my last couple years in highschool and now more recently out of highschool, I guess I've had a social anxiety problem or somethin like that. I just have a terrible fear of awkward silences, and it doesn't just happen with people I know, it happens all the time even with my friends, so when I'm chattin with my friends sometimes I just try to keep on talking about shit to avoid that awkward silence, but I notice that I start talking about myself alot and it makes me seem really egotistical and I'm not. I'm just trying to avoid the awkward silence.

Is there any suggestions you guys can give me to help me out?

easy, just get some headphones over.that's all
closedeyes.gif
 

NeSchn

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JinTrigger said:
Like Monkat said you just have to relax cause it'll happen from time to time....I have the same problem (just not as severe)
Yeah mine didn't really start to get really severe until I started my audio engineering school back in September, I mean its cool once I'm comfortable and can show my true self. But I didn't get comfortable with things (like work and school) until about 2 or 3 months in lol
 

Devante

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Not every second has to be filled with chatter.

There's such thing as enjoying silence.

As for your it happening "even" around your friends... the best kinds of friends are those you can enjoy simply being around and not saying anything.

Embrace the silent times.
 

nryn99

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most of the time i'm hanging out with my friends. i'm just listening. i only speak if no one else is speaking(respect for who is speaking) and i have something to say. but most of the times i just listen. not a good speaker but a good listener. follow what monkat said.
 
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It's not always your responsibility to keep the conversation going.
 

_Chaz_

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Actually, I have the same problem. A lot of the responses in this thread helped a bit.

Thanks, internet
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Terminator02

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you need to straight up do stuff with them, you have nothing to talk about with them unless you both do something together which you can later talk about, whether thats videogames or paintball or school it doesn't matter
 

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