Don't regret for the rest of you life!

@PityOnU Mien Gott. Is there a smaller version of that? Or a summary? Geepers

Eh, not really. As you get older, you realize life is full of nuance that bullet points don't necessarily capture. Made it as short as I could!

I'd have to say True to that. At 63, yup. I just tend to like smaller versions of conversations. a Summation if you will.

Don't go looking for romantic partners when others can influence who you pick

@PityOnU Yeah, I agree with that statement about nuance and the tl;dr mindset. I get why people want the latter, but part of the reason why some of my posts turn into short-story length posts like your response is because some things require more explanation than "Bro, Eliza just wasn't my type," or some other vague statement.

Anyways, let's just say the girl that I mentioned in my post involved a lot of the similar things that you mentioned, except my parents had no idea that we were dating as long as we were, and especially doing the things we did together with no supervision from a chaperone, a requirement for dating in these particular churches because, apparently, as it turns out, one can lose control when "experiencing" things. And considering how, until I got some protection, that we avoided going all out, (really hope what I'm saying here isn't too suggestive for GBATemp) I personally still had some sense of autonomy and an ability to control myself for reasons that would honestly involve me going into TMI territory (which I probably have already crossed in the views of some), like a lot of my parents' fears, they are disproven as far as I'm concerned. I get that lesser men and women have lost control of themselves, and that its led to problems up to, but not necessarily including poverty, divorce, children growing up without a consistent set of parents to take care of them, etc., I can understand some of the rhetoric being more generalized not just in the churches I grew up in, but also at home as well, but its like all of these fears of "if you go all out before wedlock, God won't bless you, if you play Mortal Kombat and enjoy the fatalities because its just a game, you're not a Christian with the right mindset towards God, if you like any music that isn't classical or gospel, then you aren't saved and you're on your way to Hell!", it just doesn't hold up in what I've experienced.

I don't mean to say that I haven't had a good upbringing. In a lot of ways, compared to some of these horror stories with children who live in one house one week, and then move to the other parents' house the next, it could be worse. But to have an identity and way of life forced on myself that, for the sake of having a roof over my head, utilities taken care of, food to eat, water to drink, I live a false life, behind a metaphorical mask (ironically enough) that I want to remove and be able to just be myself, think what I want to think, and live how I want to live, including being able to date a girl as Silent_Gunner, and not "Silent_Gunner, but with parents helicoptering over me, with a sniper ready to knock me out if I go too far out of line."

My favorite older brother had gone through a similar struggle, and when what he was arguing with my parents about his faith, it got to the point where my father said that he wasn't a true Christian, and then they basically pressured him to go to college that semester/year, and then he came back thinking more in-line with how my parents wanted him to. And the oldest brother of my family moved out for a similar reason to myself. These two incidents, as far as I could observe in the older brothers below them and for myself growing up, served as warnings for those who stepped too far out of line in terms of beliefs expressed while living under my parents' roof. I had a friend from HS up until 6 years ago who's behavior reminded me a lot of my father's anytime me and my older bros didn't live how he wanted them to live, and that was sort of the catalyst for coming to a line of thought not too dissimilar from what you just expressed, albeit probably better organized than what I normally could type out.

I do plan to move out at some point this year, but I couldn't say where atm. Illinois isn't exactly getting better in terms of economics, jobs available (especially the good paying ones, which, if you want to even be considered, requires you to know someone and to be on good terms with 'em), and the weather right now would be a wonderland for Sub-Zero and Glacius. My parents want me to just move out to somewhere within the state, and I'm like, "what, so I can keep taking it in the back with every paycheck? I want to be more in control of my finances!"

Seems like you have a good idea of where you and your family stand in the grand scheme of things. Just try to stay confident and keep making the decisions you know need to be made. It'll suck in the meantime, but if you just keep slowly plugging away, things really will work out eventually.

Best of luck, my dude!

LoL. nvr mind.

I did it a few years back.
Two kids and about 10 years later, 10/10 would ask again.

And Valentine's day is stupid.
Love your loved one everyday, instead of compensating by aquiring artificial ego massagers for the day.

Love is a marathon, people.

Heck, I'm no romantic and I don't give a damn about the 14th, and she doesn't mind. She always knows where to find me.
Inspecting her underwear. hehe

@eyeliner *sniffs in secret*