What's your thoughts on death?

[impeeza]

For some months now, every single night, just right before falling asleep, I start thinking (inevitably) that I'm going to die sometime later.
I don't know why I've started to feel anxious about death. It's a 180° turn for me.

I've always been estoic/agnostic about many things in life, and one of them was the fact of seizing existence. Am I using that word correctly?

Anyways... like I said, just right before falling asleep I can't help but think for couple minutes about it.
Thoughts like:
"What's even the point of being here?"
"Why should I make an effort if at the end...?"
"What if there's an afterlife? Will be spiritual? Conscience?"
"What if not?"
"If there's one, does that has an end too?"
"What if afterlife is bounded to existence of Earth? Will I stop existing "definitely" after our planet dies?"
And the most hard for me to try to understand:

"How must be like not existing, not feeling?"
"Am I ready to not feel anything?"

Even if we agreed that sleeping is a "free trial of being dead" let me admit that I've had many lucid dreams. So even then, I'm somewhat conscious and I know that I'll return to the real world.

But this hits different. I can't seem to find an answer to sooth this anxiety.
Quite pointless, I know, but still.
I'm getting old when I wasn't supposed to be old in the first place.
That's depressing.

On the words of the famous Lumalee:

"There is no escape. The only hope is the sweet relief of death..."

 

[x65943]

Want to know what is really absurd? CATS!! They get NINE lives. WTF??!

One simple trick, the grim reaper HATES this cat. Click here

 

[DinohScene]

One simple trick, the grim reaper HATES this cat. Click here

Can confirm, I found a scythe and a large bit of torn cloak with a cat laying on top of it in the stairwell this morning when I woke up.

 

[JuanMena]

I once saw a stupid comic like those Veho seems to be obsessed with, it had a cat eating from a bowl while flipping the bird at the grim reaper.

Hopefully someone will upload it now that we're touching the pussy subject.

Edit: Or was a cat cleaning itself?