I want to let go.

Are you smoking that pot?

Hey! I'm not the only one! It's not fun though.

@H1B1Esquire No, No drugs,
just what I feel

This isnt a completely unique thing. There's comfortability in inertia and it's scary to leave your comfort zone. I know exactly what you mean. It just takes discipline and perseverance to make a major change like that.

Oh, then welcome to being an adult. Get a new hobby, that's what most people do. Maybe an animal will will help get you through?

My hobby is drugs

@WeedZ
I totally don't blame you. I like trying herbal solutions--I was pretty amazed with Kratom.

I have hobbies...

Despite the fact that your brain will play tricks on you in this way, feeling like you have any control over it (if you have a form of clinical depression) is wrong. I've been dealing with it my whole life, its in my genes because I see a lot of my family on one side deal with it, and have also learned from it. I can tell you that you don't actually have a choice most of the time, if you suffer from true depression, other than eating well and exercise of course which does help, but that isn't always enough.

You're not actually holding on to the sadness though, its holding on to you. It can feel the opposite way sometimes though. Sometimes you have to put matter over mind if you will, and try things like medication. Whether that is something like going to a doctor or even 'herbal' type of stuff is up to you. Don't worry that some don't understand what you're dealing with unless they have gone through it. This isn't bad times or just a low moment, its DNA and brain chemistry, but there are ways to help it just have to find what works for you and stick to it!

WeedZ eww drugs XD

@BlueFox gui
Your brain is drugs. Everyones brains are drugs. This why is the real "eww" is reserved for zombies--fuckin' drug addicts, eating all those brains and getting high, sleeping in graves and shit. So high, they don't even change their clothes or brush their teeth. They can't even articulate a sentence, let a lone walk faster than two miles per hour.

H1B1Esquire eww drugs

Incoherent, OP. It's just, like, you know, somehow, so very, a little, basically ... without statement. You're writing around your problem, like water circling a drain. Ultimately describe the issue, or don't type at all. A gloomy, murky atmosphere with no planet to land on is pointless.

C minus.

I need to wash my hands free of dirt,
But I am not sure if I want my hands clean.

Articulate concisely and poetically, or gtfo