I'd like a sign in black and red. It would say Dimmu Jed in a large font in the middle. On the left side there would be a black and white, SEXY NUN! On the right side it would be red / white, and would be a sexy devilish female. They would be leaning against, or grinding, or leaning on my name.
Bonus points if the nun has on a cross, and the devil woman has on an upside down cross.