Let's forget for a second that we're talking about a work in progress (like you, so gracefully did), and let's compare it to FC's finished product that was made to be sold as an actual product
I actually had to dig up a bit to find this picture
http://puu.sh/ndomG/b9fb1e69c5.jpg
Which is quite comparable to what you posted.
But my gripe with that translation was mainly moments like this. I have this picture from maybe 4 years ago, maybe more I don't care to remember.
http://puu.sh/ndoJY/3c97300014.jpg
I'll probably have people asking why this can't even be called a translation.
自分もお前のような不器用な男は嫌いではない。 This translates to "I don't really dislike clumsy men such as yourself"
And look at that, this is the one situation where the translator was obviously relying on a dictionary and just made up the rest. Using a dictionary isn't in itself bad, if you do it once every couple of thousand words or more, but relying on it and translation tools to do the work for you like this example clearly shows is just hilariously pathetic.
And let's not forget, this is something that was sold to you unlike OP which is doing it out of the kindness of his heart. I remember playing this and I would really scratch my head wondering what the hell were they thinking in releasing the game on this state. Xseed lost my respect there, and I honestly don't see much reason to look up to them as anything more than average publisher.